Writing an obituary for someone you love is one of the hardest things you will be asked to do while you are already grieving. A good obituary does two things at once: it announces a death and it honors a life. This guide gives you a fill-in-the-blank template, four original examples, and plain-spoken advice so you can complete the task without second-guessing yourself.
What an Obituary Is — and What It Is Not
An obituary is a brief published notice that records the death of a person and shares the story of their life with the community. It is not a eulogy (that is spoken aloud at the service), and it is not a death notice (which is simply a name, date, and funeral details). An obituary sits between those two: it tells who this person was, who they leave behind, and how others may pay their respects.
Most obituaries run between 150 and 500 words in a newspaper. Online memorials on sites like Legacy.com or a funeral home’s website have no hard limit, so you can write as much as feels right.
What to Include in an Obituary
Before you fill in any template, gather the following information. Having it on hand makes writing much faster.
Essential facts
- Full legal name, and any nickname people actually used
- Date of birth and date of death
- City and state of residence at the time of death
- Cause of death (optional — share only what your family is comfortable making public)
Life story highlights
- Birthplace and hometown
- Education (schools, degrees, years — skip this if it feels less relevant)
- Military service, if any (branch, years, rank)
- Career: job title, employer(s), or field — focus on what the person found meaningful
- Hobbies, passions, volunteer work, faith community, clubs or organizations
- Personality traits and values — one or two sentences painted in specific detail carry more weight than a list of adjectives
Family
- Spouse or partner (name, and whether they survive the deceased or preceded them in death)
- Children (names), grandchildren, great-grandchildren (you may list numbers rather than all names if the family is large)
- Siblings
- Parents (noting whether they are living or predeceased)
- Anyone else who was truly family — a lifelong friend, a caregiver, a chosen family member
Service details
- Date, time, and location of the funeral or memorial service
- Visitation or calling hours, if applicable
- Burial or cremation location, if the family chooses to share
- Preferred charity for memorial donations in lieu of flowers
Fill-in-the-Blank Obituary Template
Copy this template and replace each bracketed item with real information. Sentences marked (optional) can be removed if they do not apply.
[Full Name], [age], of [City, State], passed away [peacefully / unexpectedly / after a brief illness / after a long illness] on [Date of Death].
Born on [Date of Birth] in [Birthplace], [he/she/they] was the [son/daughter/child] of [Parent 1 Name] and [Parent 2 Name].
[He/She/They] grew up in [Hometown] and attended [School Name], graduating in [Year]. After [finishing school / serving in the [Branch] from [Year] to [Year]], [he/she/they] built a career in [field or profession], spending [number] years at [Employer or general description]. [He/She/They] was known by colleagues for [one specific quality or habit that captures who they were at work].
Outside of work, [Name] found joy in [hobby or passion]. [He/She/They] was [a devoted member of / an active volunteer with] [organization, church, or community group]. (One sentence about a defining personal quality, told through a specific habit or value — for example, “She kept a pot of coffee on from six in the morning until the last guest left, because no one was allowed to feel unwelcome in her kitchen.”)
[Name] is survived by [his/her/their] [spouse/partner], [Spouse Name], of [City]; [his/her/their] [son/daughter/children], [Child Name(s)] of [City]; and [siblings’ names and cities]. [He/She/They] was preceded in death by [Parent Name(s)] and [any siblings or children who died earlier].
A [funeral service / memorial service / celebration of life] will be held on [Day, Date] at [Time] at [Venue Name], [Address]. Visitation will be held [Day] from [Time] to [Time]. In lieu of flowers, the family welcomes donations to [Charity Name] at [website or address].
Four Original Obituary Examples
Each example uses placeholder names and is written in a different style so you can see how tone can shift while still being dignified and warm.
Example 1: Traditional Obituary
Margaret Louise Harrington, 84, of Columbus, Ohio, passed away peacefully on June 9, 2026, surrounded by her family.
Born September 14, 1941, in Chillicothe, Ohio, she was the daughter of the late Earl and Dorothy Summers. Margaret graduated from Chillicothe High School in 1959 and went on to earn a nursing degree from Ohio State University. She worked as a registered nurse at Riverside Methodist Hospital for 32 years, retiring in 1998. Colleagues remembered her as someone who never made a patient feel like a number, no matter how busy the floor was.
Margaret was a long-standing member of Grace Lutheran Church, where she taught Sunday school for nearly two decades. She loved growing tomatoes, hosting summer cookouts, and spending winters mailing handwritten cards to anyone she had not spoken to in a while.
She is survived by her husband of 59 years, Robert Harrington; her children, Susan Harrington of Columbus and James Harrington (and his wife, Carol) of Cincinnati; four grandchildren; and one great-grandchild. She was preceded in death by her sister, Ruth Carey.
Funeral services will be held Thursday, June 12, at 11 a.m. at Grace Lutheran Church, 400 Elm Street, Columbus. Visitation will be Wednesday from 4 to 7 p.m. at Shelton Family Funeral Home. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to the American Nurses Foundation.
Example 2: Short and Simple Obituary
Thomas Alan Beck, 71, of Portland, Oregon, died June 7, 2026.
Tom was born in Eugene, Oregon, on March 2, 1955, and spent most of his life in the Pacific Northwest. He worked for 30 years as an electrician and was deeply proud of the craftsmanship he put into every job. In his free time, he fished, tinkered in his garage, and cheered loudly at his grandchildren’s soccer games.
He is survived by his wife, Patricia; his daughters, Kelly and Dana; and five grandchildren. He was preceded in death by his parents and his brother, Gary.
A graveside service will be held Saturday, June 14, at 10 a.m. at Willamette National Cemetery. The family asks that donations be made to the Oregon Food Bank.
Example 3: Obituary for a Father
Donald Ray Simmons, 68, of Nashville, Tennessee, passed away June 10, 2026, after a brief illness.
Don was born April 4, 1958, in Knoxville, Tennessee, and moved to Nashville in his twenties, where he put down roots and never left. He worked in commercial construction management for more than 40 years and took quiet satisfaction in driving past buildings he had helped put up. But if you asked Don what his real work was, he would have pointed to his four kids.
He coached Little League for 14 years, not because he was a baseball fanatic, but because that was where his children were on Saturday mornings. He taught each of his kids to drive in an empty parking lot, to check the oil themselves, and to shake a hand like they meant it. He was at every graduation, every wedding, and every hospital room that needed him.
Don is survived by his wife of 43 years, Linda Simmons; his children, Mark of Nashville, Amy of Atlanta, Brian of Memphis, and Christine of Nashville; eight grandchildren; and his brother, Gary Simmons. He was preceded in death by his parents, Raymond and Edna Simmons.
Services will be held Saturday, June 13, at 2 p.m. at Rolling Hills Community Church, Nashville. In lieu of flowers, the family welcomes donations to the Boys & Girls Clubs of Middle Tennessee.
Example 4: Obituary for a Mother
Carol Jean Whitfield, 77, of Tucson, Arizona, passed away gently on June 8, 2026, at home.
Carol was born January 23, 1949, in St. Louis, Missouri, and grew up in a house full of books and homemade bread. She studied library science at the University of Missouri and spent 28 years as a school librarian, retiring in 2001. She believed, without reservation, that the right book at the right moment could change a child’s life, and she made it her business to find the right book.
She was a meticulous gardener, a tireless letter-writer, and the person her children called first when anything — good or bad — happened. She made her house feel like a place people wanted to come back to, and they did, for decades.
Carol is survived by her three children, Daniel Whitfield of Tucson, Sarah Whitfield of Phoenix, and Rebecca Morris of Denver; six grandchildren; her sister, Joanne Keller of St. Louis; and many friends who called her family. She was preceded in death by her husband, Paul Whitfield, and her parents.
A memorial service will be held Sunday, June 15, at 1 p.m. at Sonoran Hills Funeral Chapel, 520 Desert View Lane, Tucson. The family requests donations to the Tucson-Pima Public Library Foundation in Carol’s memory.
Tips on Tone and What to Include or Omit
Getting the tone right
Write the way you would talk to a neighbor — warm, honest, and clear. Avoid stiff, formal phrases that no one actually uses in conversation (“passed from this mortal coil,” “in the arms of the angels”). Simple, specific language is more moving than elaborate language.
Specifics are your best tool. “She made a pot of soup every Sunday” tells you more about a person than “she was kind and caring.” One or two concrete details — a hobby, a habit, a phrase they always said — do more emotional work than a paragraph of general praise.
What to include
- The full name people knew them by (legal name plus nickname if it was used)
- A sentence or two of genuine personality — not just a list of roles they held
- Family connections that matter most to the survivors
- Something they did in the world: work, service, creative pursuits, caregiving
- Service details so community members know how to come and pay respects
- A charitable donation option if the family wants to redirect flowers
What to omit
- Cause of death, if the family prefers privacy (this is always your choice)
- Personal conflicts or estrangements — an obituary is not the place
- Long lists of distant relatives that blur rather than illuminate
- Clichés that don’t say anything specific about this particular person
- Apologies or disclaimers (“although he was not perfect”)
- Financial details, property, or inheritance information
A note on length
Newspapers often charge by the word or inch, so shorter costs less. Online platforms have no such limit. Write as long as the life deserves, then trim anything that repeats itself or adds no new information about who this person was.
Where and How to Publish an Obituary
Newspaper or local publication
Contact the obituary desk of your local newspaper. Most have an online submission form. Some papers publish obituaries for free; many charge a per-word or per-column-inch fee. Ask about their deadline — daily papers typically need submission one to two days before the print date.
Funeral home website
Most funeral homes publish obituaries on their own website as part of their services. Ask your funeral director if this is included in the arrangement.
National memorial platforms
Sites such as Legacy.com and Tributes.com allow families to publish obituaries that stay online indefinitely, accept condolences, and can be shared via social media. Many funeral homes submit to Legacy automatically.
Social media and personal networks
Sharing the obituary or a shorter tribute post on Facebook or Instagram is now a standard part of notifying a wider circle of friends, coworkers, and acquaintances. A private post gives family members time to see the news before it spreads publicly.
Memorial or tribute websites
Some families create a dedicated page where friends can share memories, photos, and condolences over time. This is entirely optional but can become something the family returns to for years.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Waiting too long to start. Newspapers have deadlines. Start drafting within 24 to 48 hours of the death, even if you only fill in the facts at first and come back to the story later.
Relying entirely on memory. Call other family members and close friends. They will have details, stories, and dates you do not have. A 10-minute phone call often produces the best line in the whole piece.
Writing vague compliments instead of specific details. “She was a wonderful person” tells the reader nothing. “She drove two hours every month to visit her elderly neighbors after they moved to assisted living” tells them everything.
Leaving out service information. Many people read an obituary specifically to find out when and where to attend. Double-check all dates, times, and addresses before submitting.
Not proofreading dates and spellings. Errors in a spouse’s name, a birth year, or a surviving child’s city are painful for the family after publication. Ask a second person to read the final draft before you submit.
Feeling like it has to be perfect. You are writing this while you are grieving. Do the best you can. The people who read it will understand.
When you are ready to honor your loved one beyond words, you may also want to explore how a cremation urn or a piece of cremation jewelry can keep their memory close. You’ll find compassionate guidance across all of these decisions in our memorial guides.
Frequently Asked Questions
How long should an obituary be?
Most newspaper obituaries run between 150 and 400 words. Online memorials have no limit. A good rule: include everything that is genuinely meaningful, and cut anything that repeats or adds little. Length should match the story, not a word count.
Do I have to include the cause of death?
No. Cause of death is always optional. Many families omit it entirely, especially when the death involved illness, mental health, or addiction. “Passed away on [date]” is complete and sufficient.
Who writes the obituary — the family or the funeral home?
Either can do it. Funeral homes often offer obituary writing assistance, and many families are grateful for the help. But the family always approves the final text before it is published. If you want it to sound personal, it helps to write the story yourself and let the funeral home handle the formatting and submission.
Can I publish an obituary online for free?
Yes. Many funeral home websites post obituaries as part of their services. Sites like Ever Loved offer free online obituary pages. Legacy.com and similar platforms may charge for enhanced listings, but basic postings are often free through the funeral home.
What if I made an error after it was published?
Contact the publication or platform immediately. Most newspapers will run a correction in the next edition. Online platforms can typically update text within a day. Do not wait — corrections are much easier to make while the listing is still new.
Writing an obituary is a gift you give to everyone who loved the same person you did — a way of saying, in public, this life mattered, and here is why.
